Tag Archives: Sadness

I Have No Love Song To Sing

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I have no love song to sing.
No sweet soliloquy to recite
Underneath the stars.
I’m sick with a disease that has no cure.
My heart barely beats,
As the confusion of what justice is
Proves to be a consistent strain.
I feel as if a single bullet aimed for my heart,
And pierced it multiple times.
A single body is housing multiple deaths and heartache.
As I drew my last breath,
I whispered a little prayer,
And ascended upon a higher path.
I have no love song to sing tonight.
Only a puddle full of tears and blood.

When Beautiful Black Turns To Blue

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My Feelings: When will you see me? See us? I can’t stop crying. No matter how righteous I live. No matter how educated I am. No matter how eloquent I speak. No matter how well dressed I am. I can go on and on about how well this, and how well that. Respectability means nothing, and I very well know it. Respectability will never save me from a bullet, and I know it. Nor will it ever shield me from the cruelty of white supremacy. No matter how much of a good human being I am, I’ll always be seen to some folk as an animal. A savage. A gang member. Uneducated. Sub human. A thing to be murdered, and tossed away like garbage, as if my life is worthless. When folk see the color of my skin, they don’t see me. They don’t see us. They see only what they’ve been taught to see and know. It’s America as I’ve grown to understand it. Sad. And I’ll spend the rest of my life fighting against a system that insists on fighting against me.

My heart weeps of sorrow,

In the darkest hour of the night.

Tears are shed inside,

Deep within my soul.

Yet, my tears can be seen and felt.

The weight of an unjust world

Has taken its toll.

It rests upon my shoulders,

And the load is much too heavy.

I’m tired,

As my weakened heart barely beats.

My heartache is too much to stand.

America has been killing me consistently.

A slow death it has been.

No knife to the heart.

No bullet to the dome.

Injustice will be my demise.

Won’t even have time to bid thee farewell.

Another black body blows in the dust.

It’s a sad song about us.

It’s about me.

It’s about you.

It’s what happens when black changes it’s hue.

It’s what happens when beautiful black turns to blue.

Kissing You Goodbye

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I’m kissing you goodbye again.

I’m saying farewell to heartache.

Should have never came back to you again.

So I leave ‘cause my happiness is at stake.

Never really knew you could be so cold.

Blind sided, I let you cut me so deep.

Let your sunshine and ocean nights grab hold,

And in your strong arms I’d be rocked to sleep.

What a twisted web you spun around me,

Where your light blinded me like night stars.

Wandering through darkness and could not see.

Never really knowing just what we are.

And what we are is a love in the past.

A love that has long fizzled out with time.

A love that I realized would not last.

With hope filled eyes, wanted it to be mine.

So I came back to you with hope in heart.

You treated me like your bitch in waiting,

Like I’d always be around; you were smart.

Los Angeles, you proved you are failing.

Never will I let you hurt me again.

Never again will you make my eyes cry.

Never will change my life for you again.

No, there’s no need for us to ever try.

I’m kissing you goodbye again.

I’m saying farewell to heartache.

Sometimes we have to say a painful goodbye to someone or something, whether it be abusive family members, “friends”, or even a way of life. This poem isn’t about a person, as you’ve noticed with my other “love poems” that I’ve posted on my site. Here, I’m saying goodbye to an old life, to make way for one that’s new. For it to be nicknamed “The City of Angels,” Los Angeles has caused me nothing but the blues. Moving on and doing the right thing feels so good.

Wash It All Away

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     Today is Friday, February 25, 2011 at 5:00 pm in Los Angeles, and the gray clouds are hovering above. Rainfall is expected tonight and tomorrow. There’s something soothing about listening to the rain tap against my window. Being at home, curled up on the couch with a warm blanket, while sipping on hot lemon tea, relaxes the body, the mind, and the spirit. Putting it simply, it just feels good to relax and think about nothing. Whatever troubles appear and show their ugly heads, seem to disappear to the melodic sound of raindrops. As I sit out on the balcony viewing the skyline, I await the rain. Even if for a moment, the troubles in the world or of the day will no longer matter nor exist, because the rain will wash it all away.

 

     The following poem entitled, ‘Believe,’ was written on June 30, 2009…the day I was laid off from my job. Although I was quickly rehired, I was overwhelmed with emotion. It’s not easy to have something that you love taken away from you so unfairly. But such is life, as it’s not always fair. At that moment, I couldn’t do anything else besides try to keep the faith and believe.

 

When darkness buries the sun,
And the world is upon my shoulders,
Heavy is the load I carry.
And despair is the emotion I feel.
Blinded by the unknown,
And stricken down by fear.
Possibilities remain at a distance,
As if these are merely thoughts in the wind.
Unclarity has sunken in.
Then along comes the sun.
I hear your voice, and I can see once again.
You never let me suffer,
And you never let me fail.
In my hour of sorrow, it’s your faith and love that prevails.
Faith is restored in me
And I am guided by your light.
Onward to a brand new path.

Jeff Lorber ‘Rain Dance’ Video Posted To You Tube By Herecomes Mongo On July 11, 2011