I Learned To Dance So Well In The Rain

“Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass…It’s about learning to dance in the rain.” – Vivian Greene

And dance I did.

As my 46th bornday approaches on April 4th, I’ve been reflecting on my life’s journey. I’ve come a long way from being that eight year old kid who held back tears, swallowed her pain from abuse, and declared that I would grow up to be better than the examples that I was being shown at home.

I’ll always have a vivid memory of the Saturday that my father almost ended his life and mine. Even after he hurt me to my core on this day, I put hurt and fear aside. I wanted to live. I had the courage and the strength to survive.

In all of the heartache that I’ve been through, I’ve always pushed forward. And here I am today. I’m proud that I made the decision at age eight to live. I didn’t know what my life would be like as an adult, but I had dreams of a better life full of love. I can look in the mirror and smile, because some dreams do come true. I made it. Hearts can be emotionally battered and can bend. But, hearts can also feel love again. Hearts can also mend.

I’m gratefuI learned to dance so well in the rain.

Kissing You Goodbye

I’m kissing you goodbye again.

I’m saying farewell to heartache.

Should have never came back to you again.

So I leave ‘cause my happiness is at stake.

Never really knew you could be so cold.

Blind sided, I let you cut me so deep.

Let your sunshine and ocean nights grab hold,

And in your strong arms I’d be rocked to sleep.

What a twisted web you spun around me,

Where your light blinded me like night stars.

Wandering through darkness and could not see.

Never really knowing just what we are.

And what we are is a love in the past.

A love that has long fizzled out with time.

A love that I realized would not last.

With hope filled eyes, wanted it to be mine.

So I came back to you with hope in heart.

You treated me like your bitch in waiting,

Like I’d always be around; you were smart.

Los Angeles, you proved you are failing.

Never will I let you hurt me again.

Never again will you make my eyes cry.

Never will change my life for you again.

No, there’s no need for us to ever try.

I’m kissing you goodbye again.

I’m saying farewell to heartache.

Sometimes we have to say a painful goodbye to someone or something, whether it be abusive family members, “friends”, or even a way of life. This poem isn’t about a person, as you’ve noticed with my other “love poems” that I’ve posted on my site. Here, I’m saying goodbye to an old life, to make way for one that’s new. For it to be nicknamed “The City of Angels,” Los Angeles has proven to have some devilish ways and people, and has caused me nothing but the blues. Moving on and doing the right thing feels so good.